Leo wasn’t the same after tito Paul died. He’d ignore my messages and hole himself in his room. It became rarer and rarer to see him in school.
Back then we were only fifteen. We met in grade school and had been best friends for years. Both of us were the only child of our family and we bonded through that.
I didn’t want to pretend that I knew what he was going through. Most of the adults that I talked to told me to give him space, but that, to me, just felt like giving up.
Every afternoon I’d send the same message:
“Hey L it’s Rafa. I know you’re going through some stuff right now. I’m always here if you need me, to talk or just to be there. Hit me up when you can please. I’m really worried about you.”
He’d leave me on seen, which was still a relief for me. At least he’d know I was there.
After a week he finally messaged back:
“Hey R, sorry I didn’t get back to you ‘til now. Things have been getting too much to handle, haven’t been sleeping much. Thanks for reaching out to me, I really appreciate it. Let’s talk soon alright?”
And I replied:
“Of course L, I know tito Paul’s passing hit you hard. I know wherever he is now he’s wishing you’re alright.”
His reply unsettled me:
“He was a bastard.”
=————————————————————=
After that conversation Leo didn’t contact me for a month. He was the main topic of everyone’s gossip in school. Someone started the rumor that he was put in a mental institution and would have to stay there for the whole year. There was another where they said he ran away weeks ago and they found him in a ditch and the family wanted to keep his death a secret.
I tried to shut them down the best I could, but once the words were out in the air they couldn’t be brought down.
Leo’s last message still disconcerted me. I had known their family for years and they seemed to be happy.
Tita Tress was an OFW, she spent most of her time in Saudi, but would visit every now and then, every other year during holiday season. Tito Paul was a loud man, in the best sense of the term. He would always tell everyone about Leo’s achievements and would put them all over their sala.
My mind raced to all the possibilities of what Leo could have meant.
What was tito Paul like behind closed doors? Was there any kind of abuse?
Why didn’t my best friend tell me?
Looking back, I realize how selfish I was, trying to make this about myself. Leo was the one that had the problem. If he didn’t want to tell me that was his choice.
I still messaged him every afternoon and he still would leave me on seen.
At the very least he’s alive. I’d think to myself.
I hung onto that thought to the latter part of that year. I was so scared that he’d leave my messages unseen and I’d never hear from him ever again.
I was just a scared kid that needed his best friend to be okay.
=———————————————————————————=
It was the end of the rainy season when I finally got a response from Leo. It was just one message but it filled my heart with hope. Leo was alive and I could finally see him.
MEET ME AT THE PARK TONIGHT AT 11
It was late. It was far. It didn’t matter.
Leo was my best friend and he needed me.
That night I told my parents that I was going to bed early. I was the requisite good boy. Good grades, well behaved, always on time, etc. My family wouldn’t suspect a thing.
The park was 3 kilometers away from me and I biked using the light of the moon. I was lucky there was a full moon that night.
When I got to the park I sat by the balete tree and waited for Leo.
“R?”
A hand gripped my shoulder from behind and my heart nearly jumped to my chest.
“Dammit L, don’t scare me like that! God!”
“Sorry.”
Leo looked awful. His hair was disheveled, eyes sunken and he was thinner than I’d ever seen him.
He tried to avoid eye contact and took a step back, knowing what he looked like.
I still gave him the biggest hug I could.
I didn’t know how much time passed and I thought it would be best for me to break the silence.
“I know things have been rough since your dad passed.”
“YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT HE TURNED ME INTO!”
The reply made me step back. Leo face was flooding with tears.
“You’re right, I don’t. But that’s why I’m here. Let me listen. Please, L.”
“I just don’t want to hurt anyone.”
“You won’t hurt me, I promise. Let’s just have a seat and talk, okay?”
“You should sit, I need you to see this.”
I did what he asked, sitting back by the balete tree. The whole park was illuminated by the light of the full moon.
Nothing could have prepared me for what Leo was about to do. Even now the memory horrifies me.
I could hear his spine crack as his neck turned. His body shivered as it fell to the ground and what was left was hollow. I could see his heart beat and his lungs inflate as they detached.
He was floating through the air with nothing but his head and organs.
I vomited as the grisly spectacle finished.
He looked at me and I could still see the tears in his eyes. He said, “This is me. This is what I have become.”
The silence was heavy.
This time it was Leo who broke the silence.
He told me about his father. There was an inheritance from tito Paul’s side of the family, a curse that Leo only learned about as his father passed away. They were magtatangal, creatures that fed on human flesh who flew at night, searching for victims.
“I tried to be only catching cats and dogs, but every day the curse gets stronger. Every time I see someone at night I want to change and eat their hearts.”
“What about tita?”
“Papa kept the curse a secret from her, it’s why he pushed her to be an OFW.”
“This is why you haven’t talked to me.”
“Yes.”
“Why are you telling me this now?”
Leo floated to a tree a few meters away.
“Do you see that bag?”
“Yeah.”
“Open it.”
The bag was filled with salt and what looked to be a grey powder.
“What is—”
“If you put the salt and ashes on my body I won’t be able to reattach. Once the sun hits me….”
“What are you talking about?”
“If the ash and salt are sprinkled on my body, I won’t be able to reattach. If I cant be complete when the sun hits, I won’t be coming back from that.”
“You…..do you want me to kill you?!”
“I can’t keep doing this R. Every day my instincts tell me to kill people I see. Don’t you understand?! I’m going to hurt someone and then another and then another. It’s just going to get easier for me. Until I’m as much a monster as I look like.”
“It doesn’t have to be this way, we can find someone to talk to, there has to be something else we can do!”
Leo floated nearer to me.
“Did you know my dad kept trophies? He showed them to me before he gave me the curse. They were bones, small ones. There must have been hundreds of them.”
Another pause, another break in the silence.
“L, please don’t make me do this. I’m your best friend.”
“That’s why I’m telling you this. Please R. I don’t wat to hurt anyone else.”
Leo sobbed unceasingly, his tears falling onto his floating organs.
Memories started to flood my mind, the fear pulsing through my veins, until something struck me.
“Remember when we were ten and I thought I could fly?”
“Yeah your leg had to be in a cast for nearly half a year.”
“What’s it like to fly?”
“It’s the most liberating feeling you could ever have.”
“And you still want to end it?”
“Yes.”
I stood above his hollow body and sprinkled the salt and ash.
I looked at Leo in his eyes and asked him, “is there anything else you want me to do?”
“Can you stay with me? Until the sun comes up?”
“Anything for you.”
We sat there for hours waiting for sunrise. When it happened it was faster than I expected, Leo’s body and head disintegrated as soon as the sun rays hit them.
When my parents found out that I snuck out they were livid. I told them I was trying to find Leo and they eased out of punishing me. I think they saw that I was crying.
There was even more gossip after that. Leo ran away and was assumed dead was the most popular theory. I never corrected them and as the years passed people forgot.
=———————————————-=
To this day, I still remember him asking me to make the most difficult decision of our lives.
Goodbye L.
I’ll always miss you.
=———————————————–=
Written by Karl Gaverza
Copyright © Karl Gaverza
Inspired by the description of the Magtatangal in “Distinctions Made Among the Priests of the Devil” in “Customs of the Tagalogs” by Juan de Plasencia. 1589.
Magtatangal Illustration by Fam Telmo
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