Chrissie and I always go by the river. It’s our little spot to get away from the world and just talk. Today the topic was the new girl.
“She thinks she’s so great, with her long hair and those nails, but let’s face it I don’t know what perfume she uses but it smells like patis.”
“I know right, she’s so annoying, always playing the damsel in distress, getting all the guys to help her carry things. I don’t know why they even find her pretty, she needs a haircut, the wet look went out of style years ago.”
“Yeah I think she’s absolutely stupid, she’s not helpful at all. We were setting up for a show right and she was one of the volunteers, but somehow the director gave her a part and she’s so dumb I feel like she has no respect for herself at all. She cheats on guys left and right and it’s like the minute he changes her co-star, her love life follows. She even slept with a married guy, I find her absolutely disgusting.”
“Then of course we can go into how she’s always making stupid comments with her annoying voice. And how she thinks she’s funny or witty and whines when people don’t laugh at her jokes but takes no subtlety when rolling her eyes at someone else bad humor.”
“Oh and let’s not forget how arrogant she is to go into other people’s issues with her “helpful advice” because god knows how horrible it’d be if she didn’t get her say about things. Seriously, who could be so rude as to think they have any place butting into people’s personal problems.”
“Worse than that she hates on people who get what she wants before she does, so it’s like not only are you super self absorbed, you’re also a bad person and a bad friend because you can’t get past your own ego to appreciate what someone else has.”
“Ugh I hate her—— Wait, do you smell that?”
“Yeah smells like her horrible perfume.”
“I think it’s coming from the river.”
Water just splashed over us and I hugged Chrissie when I saw the river part.
“I heard you girls were talking about me.”
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Written by Karl Gaverza
Copyright © Karl Gaverza
Story inspired by Sirena description in El Folk-lore Filipino. Isabelo de los Reyes, trans. Dizon and Peralta-Imson. 1994. (Original Spanish Manuscript Printed 1889)
Sirena (Ilokano) Illustration and Watercolor by Marc Magpantay
