*Note this story is in Tagalog
Pare-parehas ang aking masamang panaginip.
Nagsisimula ito sa aking higaan. Palagi na lang akong nasa ospital at hindi malaman ng mga doktor ang aking karamdaman. Lagi nilang inuulit ang pagsusuri sa akin, habang idinadaan ko lang sa biro ang lahat. Alam kong magpapatuloy ang sakit na nararanasan ko, pero hindi ko sila kayang sisihin dahil ginagawa lamang nila ang kanilang tungkulin.
Dumating na ang karayom at tumagal ng ilang oras ang pagtuturok nila sa akin. Pinapagaan ng nars ang aking pakiramdam, at sinabi niya na hindi magtatagal magiging maayos din ako. Napanatag ang aking kalooban dahil nasa mabuting kamay ang buhay ko, kaya ang kailangan kong gawin sa ngayon ay magtiwala sa kanila hanggang sa ako ay gumaling.
Hindi pa tapos ang hirap dahil kapag nagwakas na ang panggagamot nila sa akin, mararamdaman ko naman ang kalungkutan dala ng pagiging mapag-isa sa aking kuwarto. Naalala ko noong una akong dinala sa ospital, binabantayan lamang nila ako at may bumibista sa aking doktor bawat oras para kumustahin ang aking kalagayan.
Doon ko biglang nakita ang mahabang nilalang na may bahid na pula sa bubungan. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang aking nakikita at kung nakadikit siya sa kung saan, pero nagmumukha itong buhay dahil gumagalaw ito. Gusto kong kumilos para makaiwas sa kaniya, pero mahina ang aking katawan dulot na rin ng mga gamutang pinagdaanan ko.
Dumating ang puntong dumikit sa akin ang dila niya at bigla kong nakaramdam ang sobrang pagod. Hinihigop niya ang bawat lakas ko hanggang sa pagod na rin akong matakot. Titig lang ang kaya kong gawin sa mga oras na iyon. Ang lamig na humaplos sa aking balat ay kumalat sa aking buong katawan.
Sinubukan kong sumigaw pero hindi ko kaya dahil sa sobrang kapaguran. Umiikot ang kakaibang pakiramdam sa aking katawan at ngayon, hindi ko alam kung gaano na ito katagal. Gusto ko lang namang makatulog ulit.
Biglang pumasok ang nars sa kuwarto ko at kusang naglaho ang nilalang sa aking harapan. Kinukumusta niya ako kung maayos lang aking kalagayan. Nahihirapan akong sumagot na “hindi” dahil sa kalagayan ng aking katawan.
“Matagal kang gising ngayon dahil sa gamot, pero makakatulog ka rin.” sabi sa akin ng nars.
Gusto kong sumigaw, ngunit walang boses na lumalabas.
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English Version
Every nightmare I have is the same.
It all starts in my bed. I’m in the hospital, as always. The doctors still don’t know what’s wrong with me. They say that they’re going to try another test and I humor them. I know it’s going to be painful for me, but I don’t blame the doctors, they’re just trying to do their jobs.
Then the needles arrive. I get poked and prodded for hours. The nurses try to reassure me. They tell me that everything’s going to be fine and it will all be over soon. They wouldn’t do anything that would make things worse so all I have to do is breathe, just until it’s over.
The worst part comes when it’s all over. After the tests and the treatments, I’m alone in my hospital bed. Back where I started. They tell me I’ll be put on observation and there will be a doctor checking on me every few hours.
That’s when I see it, something long and red coming from the roof. I don’t know what it is and I don’t know if it’s attached to anything, but it moves like it was alive. I can’t move. I’m too weak from all the tests to stop it from touching me.
Then I feel it. The moment the red thing touches me, it’s like I ran a marathon. The energy flows out of me until I’m too tired to even be afraid. All I do is stare at the red thing. It feels cold to the touch and it moves around until it touches every part of my body.
I try to scream but I’m too tired. The strange sensation is all over my body now and I don’t know how long it’s been. I just want to go back to sleep.
Then suddenly, a nurse walks in. The red thing disappears from my sight. She asks me if I’m okay and I can’t muster the strength to say no.
“Don’t worry the medicine will only keep you awake for a little while longer then you can sleep,” she says.
I try to scream again but nothing comes out.
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*Tagalog is an Austronesian language spoken as a first language by a quarter of the population of the Philippines and as a second language by the majority. Its standardized form, officially named Filipino, is the national language of the Philippines, and is one of two official languages alongside English.
Written by Karl Gaverza
Translation by Emman Bernardino
Copyright © Karl Gaverza
Translation Copyright © Emman Bernardino
Inspired by the Mansusopsop legends
Mansusopsop Illustration by NightmareSyrup
Tumblr: http://
IG: @NightmareSyrup