Monica steps out of her car and takes in the fresh mountain air. Mount Lantoy, the vastness of the landscape takes her in and she is once again a small girl of 8, wandering through the forest. Her memories overtake her and she can hear the sound of the birds as they fly through the treetops. She remembers her bare feet pressed against the rocks by the river. Most of all she remembers Her.
The memories come flooding back now, but they are bittersweet. She was a little girl who disobeyed her parents on a camping trip and rushed headlong through the wilderness. It took an hour before she could admit to herself that she was lost and by then she was in the middle of nowhere, crying her eyes out. Then She came. She was so beautiful that Monica could almost feel her tears flowing back into her eyes, it just felt wrong to feel sadness near anything that lovely.
Lovely was the only way to describe her journey with Maria Cacao, the Diwata of the mountain. The moment Maria took Monica’s hand and led her to her golden ship was burned into Monica’s very soul. They traveled across the mountain, through ruined bridges and in dark caves and Maria taught her things that no human was supposed to know. Monica learned the secret language of spirits and was told where they gathered. She could feel the rush of nature and knew the voice of the wind, the portents of the moon and the laughter of the grass.
She was happy then, happier than she had ever been in her life. Monica didn’t know how long she stayed with Maria Cacao. It had felt like an eternity being raised by a gifted mentor, a caring mother and a loyal friend, all wrapped into one person.
It made what happened after much more painful.
Monica wipes the tears from her face, she didn’t realize she was crying, but the memories felt too real. She looks at her hands and feels her scars and remembers what needs to be done.
This is not a homecoming.
This is an atonement. She will ask forgiveness from the spirit of the mountain and she prays that it will be enough.
Monica throws her phone into her car and walks away. She knows the life she is leaving behind, but deep in her bones she realizes that was never the life she was supposed to lead. The mountain is where she belongs now.
Come what may.
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Written by Karl Gaverza
Copyright © Karl Gaverza
Story inspired by ‘Maria Cacao’ in Philippine Folk Literature: The Legends. Eugenio. 2002.
Maria Cacao Illustration and Watercolor by Laura Katigbak
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